Are people having four or five children just because they can? Because they feel that it shows their wealth and status?

Raising kids today costs a fortune. Last month, the Department of Agriculture estimated that each American child costs an average of $204,060 to house, clothe, educate and entertain until the age of 18. What’s worse, the desire to have another child opens one up to charges of elitism and status consciousness. In many major U.S. cities and their suburbs having three or more children has now come to seem like an ostentatious display of good fortune. The family of five has become “deluxe.”

We not only wonder, we marvel, we get jealous, we gawk. “Having three kids in the city is a way of showing off, absolutely,” says Elisabeth Egan, who, like many families she knows, moved out of New York to the suburbs of Montclair, N.J., to manage the feat. “A third child in the city is definitely a luxury good.”

A February analysis of Current Population Survey data by the Council on Contemporary Families found that in the past 10 years, the top-earning 1.3% of the population has seen an uptick in families with three or more children. According to the National Center for Health Statistics, 12% of upper-income women had three children or more in 2002, compared with only 3% in 1995.

For a couple’s every conceivable wish or worry, the parenting industry knows the precise formula of guilt, fear, hope, love and desire that will empty the parental wallet. Rather than fret about spending too much money, most parents these days are consumed by the anxiety of underspending on their children.

So parents quickly adjust to the demanding realities of the child-rearing industry. Today’s American children, by contrast, get an average of 70 new toys a year.  Baby showers have replaced bridal showers as the blowout du jour; American women today have an average of three. The accompanying baby registries have mushroomed into a $240 million business. In upscale urban areas and tony suburban enclaves, where luxury families are flourishing, that can translate to $800 a week for child care alone. So-called high-end nannies (those who hail from licensed agencies and come equipped with working papers and even driver’s licenses) can cost more than $50,000 a year on the books.

Most families simply can’t afford all this. And surely it can’t all be necessary.

This entry was posted on Monday, April 7th, 2008 at 1:40 pm and is filed under American Education, Helping Women, Money Savvy, Only in America, People, People Are Funny, Personal Finance, Rich People Are Funny, Studies and Surveys, That's Life. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.