Workers in certain industries can have more comfort in knowing that, even if they are fired, there is so much demand they should be able to find another job very quickly.

Talk of a recession and creeping unemployment rates are enough to make you wonder: Where can you find stability in unstable times? Kiplinger consulted career experts and combed through job trend data to come up with five industries that should provide safer havens to workers, no matter what the economy is doing. No matter what field you work in, you have the possibility of losing your job. But there are things you can do to protect yourself and increase your odds of getting another job, just in case.

Healthcare  
Many of the nation’s fastest-growing careers are in the health care industry, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. An increasingly aging population fuels demand in this field. Some specific jobs with stable prospects include doctor, nurse, pharmacist, physical therapist and physician assistant.

Education
Teachers for any grade level who specialize in high-demand fields such as math, science or bilingual education should have an easier time finding and keeping a job. And the outlook for college instructors looks stable, too. College enrollment is rising as the number of 18- to 24-year-olds increases. Some areas of the country are more stable than others for teachers because education jobs follow population trends. So teachers in fast-growing states in the South and West, such as Nevada, Arizona, Texas and Georgia, will have more opportunity than in slower-growth areas in the Midwest and Northeast.

Security
Crime doesn’t stop in a recession. That makes security jobs, such as police officers, detectives, private security guards and international security experts, a good bet. Layoffs in this industry are rare. In the off-chance law enforcement officers lose their jobs to budget cuts, they have little difficulty finding jobs with other agencies because demand is so high.

Environmental Sciences
The current “green” movement reaches far beyond changing your light bulbs to fluorescents. It’s also translating into a solid career choice. The BLS expects environmental careers, including ecologists, hydrologists, environmental chemists and others, to grow 25% over the next decade.

Government
Some of the most stable jobs around are within the federal government, where firings and lay-offs happen at just one-quarter the rate in the private sector. One reason: Even in hard economic times when big businesses are forced to downsize, the government must carry on. And only one in every 5,000 non-defense workers is ever fired for poor performance each year. Crazy odds! Due to an increasingly aging workforce, the government is doing a lot of hiring lately, especially among the 20-something crowd.

Kissing @** is Tough Work. If You’re Going To Do It, Make Sure It’s The Right Way

There’s an art to sucking up, and if the boss (or your co-workers) can figure out what you’re up to, you’re not doing it right. More importantly, it will backfire. So while everyone calls it something different, it’s key to your success at work.

1. Speak your boss’ language. Figure out your boss’ style and adapt to it. Is your boss a huge sports fan? Learn sports metaphors and incorporate them into your conversations about work.

2. Make everything seem like it’s the boss’ idea. Instead of simply pitching the boss an idea, say something like, “Thanks for your guidance on that issue. As a result of your direction, here’s how I’d like to handle it.” That makes it seem like this bright idea you have is actually his.

3. Avoid gratuitous compliments. No need to gush over the boss’ new outfit. Instead, use compliments strategically. For instance, “That was a great idea you mentioned the other day. Here’s how I think we can execute it.”

4. Give the boss what he or she wants. If your boss is detailed and needs all your work to be the same, then do it. Give your boss the type of work he or she wants. Don’t waste time by complaining. It may not be the way you prefer to work, but it’s what your boss wants and that’s all that matters. Don’t complain or fight her about it.

5. Ask permission before offering input. This is a way of showing deference to the boss. Before offering your opinion say, “Can I give you some ideas that might enhance this project?” Or, “Would you be open to a different opinion than the one we’re talking about?” If you ask for permission to offer your thoughts, your manager will rarely say no.

6. Match the boss’ energy. If your boss is short, sequential and fast, match that. If he or she is leisurely and ponderous, match that. You get it. Each time you match the boss’ energy, you build trust and strengthen the relationship.

7. Respect the boss’ position. Remind him or her that you know who’s the boss. For instance, say, “I have these ideas, but I will defer to your decision.”

There Are No Excuses For Why You’re In Debt

Self-deception and a lack of control are the chief reasons for many poor spending decisions, and whiny explanations about wasteful purchases are nothing more than excuses for bad spending behavior.

1.  I could die tomorrow, so I’ll live for today. This immature attitude justifies actions of the buy-it-now and pay-for-it-whenever class. It’s the primary excuse for not saving money.

2. I work hard, I deserve it.  While it is true that many Americans are overworked and that you have to treat yourself occasionally, self-gifting is more prominent today because of advertising pitches to buy things “because you deserve them.” You also deserve to live out a retirement.

3. I don’t have a head for numbers. This is the excuse given for not paying attention to personal finances. Managing money doesn’t require complicated mathematics. Consumers now have a plethora of free online tools to help with all sorts of financial planning.

4. I’m too busy to compare prices or manage money. This might be true for a small fraction of people, but mostly it’s a lie. Shutting off the TV one night a week will provide most people plenty of time to manage their finances. For those truly time-strapped, consider hiring a good financial adviser.

5. It’s an investment. Most consumer purchases aren’t investments, because almost all of them plummet in value the moment you leave the store. So you don’t “invest” in a car, a plasma TV or a new pair of shoes unless somehow they’ll make you money. They are expenses. Calling them an investment is self-delusion.

6. I don’t earn enough to save money. Saving is not about what you earn, it’s about what you keep. If your paycheck truly covers only the cost of bare necessities, you have an income problem. It’s time to work more hours or earn more with the hours you work.

 Take The Quiz

If employee turnover and absenteeism within the company are too high, and productivity and morale too low, the person in charge may be the one at fault.To find out how good or bad — a boss you are, the National Federation of Independent Business, a small business advocacy group, suggests asking yourself these questions:

1. Have you ever publicly criticized an employee?

2. Do you take credit for your employees’ work?

3. Do your employees fear you?

4. Do you expect employees to do what you tell them without question?

5. Do you believe employees should know what to do without you telling them or providing guidelines?

6. Are you a yeller?

7. Do you demean employees as a form of punishment?

8. Do you play favorites?

9. Do you hate delegating?

10. Do you check everyone’s work?

According to the answer key, the more “yes” answers, the greater the likelihood you are a bad boss. Author Trevor Gay has come up with a basic list of the differences between good and bad bosses. In his 35 years of work (in the health care industry), Mr. Gay said he discovered that his best bosses had these attributes:

• Inspired confidence
• Were humble
• Had integrity
• Knew what they were talking about
• Let me get on with things
• Were always there when I needed help
• Usually said, ‘Yes, try it.’”

His worst bosses had these deficiencies:

• Never seemed to be around when I needed them
• Always asked me to justify what I wanted to do
• Always wanted to know what I was doing
• Often said ‘no, we can’t do that’
• Gave the impression of being distrustful
• Didn’t smile much
• Talked about themselves a lot.

Look at the World Differently and Come Up With New Solutions

 As our knowledge and expertise increase, our creativity and ability to innovate tend to taper off. Why? Because the walls of the proverbial box in which we think are thickening along with our experience. “When everybody knows that something is so, it means that nobody knows nothin’,” said Andrew S. Grove, the co-founder of Intel. In other words, it becomes nearly impossible to look beyond what you know and think outside the box you’ve built around yourself.

This so-called curse of knowledge, a phrase used in a 1989 paper in The Journal of Political Economy, means that once you’ve become an expert in a particular subject, it’s hard to imagine not knowing what you do. Your conversations with others in the field are peppered with catch phrases and jargon that are foreign to the uninitiated. When it’s time to accomplish a task — open a store, build a house, buy new cash registers, sell insurance — those in the know get it done the way it has always been done, stifling innovation as they barrel along the well-worn path.

That’s a common reaction when experts set out to share their ideas in the business world, too, say co-authors and brothers Chip and Dan Heath. It’s why engineers design products ultimately useful only to other engineers. It’s why managers have trouble convincing the rank and file to adopt new processes. And it’s why the advertising world struggles to convey commercial messages to consumers. People who design products are experts cursed by their knowledge, and they can’t imagine what it’s like to be as ignorant as the rest of us. But there are proven ways to exorcise the curse.

To innovate you have to bring together people with a variety of skills. If those people can’t communicate clearly with one another, innovation gets bogged down in the abstract language of specialization and expertise. “It’s kind of like the ugly American tourist trying to get across an idea in another country by speaking English slowly and more loudly,” says Heath. “You’ve got to find the common connections.”

Author Cynthia Barton Rabe proposes bringing in outsiders whom she calls zero-gravity thinkers to keep creativity and innovation on track. When experts have to slow down and go back to basics to bring an outsider up to speed, she says, “it forces them to look at their world differently and, as a result, they come up with new solutions to old problems.”

Each of the following mistakes can cost you $100,000.

1.) Investing too conservatively during retirement. If you follow conventional wisdom and, as you approach retirement, shift money out of stocks into more stable investments you could miss many opportunities. Instead of parking too much of your assets in bonds, invest in an asset mix that leaves enough room for Standard & Poor’s 500 stock index.

2.) Launching a divorce war. A full courtroom showdown can easily cost $250,000. Try to soften the financial impact by using a lower-cost mediation option. Or try to work on saving your marriage.

3.) Underinsuring your home. If you’ve lived in the same house for at least 10 years, it’s probably worth 50% to 100% more than you paid for it. But if you haven’t updated your homeowners insurance, you could lose those gains if disaster strikes. Ask your insurer to reassess your home’s replacement cost and adjust coverage accordingly.

4.) Overpaying for your mortgage. The annual percentage rates on mortgages in a given area can vary by close to a percentage point. Over a typical 30-year term, this can cost you $27,000 on a $299,000 home. Shop for the best mortgage rate by checking local banks, your credit union, big-lender Web sites and mortgage-related sites.

5.) Maintaining an unhealthy lifestyle. Bad health habits not only catch up with you as you age but they can also hit you in the pocketbook in the form of higher life-insurance premiums. Before you apply for life insurance, consult your doctor about the best way to get your health status in line with the “preferred plus” underwriting requirements.

6.) Paying needless fund fees. If you buy mutual funds from a broker, you could pay a commission, or “load,” of up to 5.75%. Annual expenses can also vary among funds, from 1.5% or more a year to as little as 0.1%. Fix: Choose no-load mutual funds with low expense ratios. You can buy them directly from investment companies such as Fidelity, T. Rowe Price, and Vanguard.

If you follow the 7 goal setting steps outlined in this article, you will be well on your way to becoming an expert in building the road maps to your goals.

1. Make sure the goal you are working for is something you really want, not just something that sounds good. Sure, when talking to people about your goals it sounds pretty good, and many people will be quite impressed. When setting goals it is very important to remember that your goals must be consistent with your values.

2. A goal can not contradict any of your other goals. For example, you can’t buy a $750,000 house if your income goal is only $50,000 per year. This is called non-integrated thinking and will sabotage all of the hard work you put into your goals. Non-integrated thinking can also hamper your everyday thoughts as well. We should continually strive to eliminate contradictory ideas from our thinking.

3. Develop goals in the 6 areas of life:

• Family and Home
• Financial and Career
• Spiritual and Ethical
• Physical and Health
• Social and Cultural
• Mental and Educational

Setting goals in each area of life will ensure a more balanced life as you begin to examine and change the fundamentals of everyday living. Setting goals in each area of life also helps in eliminating the non-integrated thinking we talked about in the 2nd step.

4. Write your goal in the positive instead of the negative. Work for what you want, not for what you want to leave behind. Part of the reason why we write down and examine our goals is to create a set of instructions for our subconscious mind to carry out. Your subconscious mind is a very efficient tool, it can not determine right from wrong and it does not judge. It’s only function is to carry out its instructions. The more positive instructions you give it, the more positive results you will get. Thinking positively in everyday life will also help in your growth as a human being. Don’t limit it to goal setting.

5. Write your goal out in complete detail. Instead of writing “A new home,” write “A 4,000 square foot contemporary with 4 bedrooms and 3 baths and a view of the mountain on 20 acres of land.”

Once again we are giving the subconscious mind a detailed set of instructions to work on. The more information you give it, the more clear the final outcome becomes. The more precise the outcome, the more efficient the subconscious mind can become. Can you close your eyes and visualize the home I described above? Walk around the house. Stand on the porch off the master bedroom and see the fog lifting off the mountain. Look down at the garden full of tomatoes, green beans and cucumbers. And off to the right is the other garden full of a mums, carnations and roses. Can you see it? So can your subconscious mind.

6. By all means, make sure your goal is high enough.  Shoot for the moon, if you miss you’ll still be in the stars.  Some of you might be saying that I’m not setting my goals high enough. Not so.

7. This is the most important, write down your goals. Although just the act of writing them down can set the process in motion, it is also extremely important to review your goals frequently. Remember, the more focused you are on your goals the more likely you are to accomplish them.

Parallel Lessons

• Let Them Cry   Sometimes, no matter how hard it may be, you need to let them cry it out. Whether it’s an employee who wants more of something but hasn’t quite earned it yet or a baby who is overtired and needs to sleep, you can’t always get what you want. As a parent and a CEO, you can’t always give them what they ask for.
• Count to 10   Losing your temper is not a good way to show that you are in charge and worthy of respect. It’s also not a good way to help your staff/child improve. Count to 10 before you react, and think about how a measured response will get you much better results. I’ve found that in most cases when I’m really angry, it’s a very temporary thing.
• Let Them Fail   There are many times when you just need to sit back and watch people fail for their own good. Employees need to botch a sale, sometimes, in order to learn how to do it correctly. Kids have to fall down when trying to stand, walk or ride a bike. If you save either from the mistakes before they happen, you’ll deprive them of the chance to learn important lessons firsthand.
• Carrots, Not Sticks   This is a wonderful lesson that really works with kids. Rewarding good behavior creates a desire to behave well without all the trauma of avoiding pain.
• Be the Boss/Parent   There is a desire among bosses to be friendly with your staff. When push comes to shove, you have to be able to separate as a friend and be the boss. There is a huge difference between being friendly and being friends. Parents are in the same boat — you can love your kids, but you are not their friend. You need to have that separation for times when you need to use your authority.

 How Well Are You Dealing With Stress?

One-third of Americans are living with extreme stress and nearly half of Americans (48%) believe that their stress has increased over the past five years. Stress is taking a toll on people — contributing to health problems, poor relationships and lost productivity at work, according to a new national survey released today by the American Psychological Association (APA).

Money and work continue as the leading causes of stress for three quarters of Americans. Nearly half of all Americans report that stress has a negative impact on both their personal and professional lives. Stress causes more than half of Americans (54%) to fight with people close to them. One in four people report that they have been alienated from a friend or family member because of stress, with 8% connecting stress to divorce or separation.

Stress in America continues to escalate and is affecting every aspect of people’s lives — from work to personal relationships to sleep patterns and eating habits, as well as their health. Physical symptoms of stress include: fatigue); headache; upset stomach; muscle tension; change in appetite; teeth grinding; change in sex drive and feeling dizzy.  Psychological symptoms of stress include: experiencing irritability or anger,  feeling nervous, lack of energy and feeling as though you could cry.  In addition, almost half (48%) of Americans report lying awake at night due to stress.

While many Americans recognize that stress has a negative impact on their health, they may lack the motivation to make lifestyle and behavior changes. Only 35% report that they would modify their behavior following the diagnosis of a chronic condition. Encouragement from a spouse or partner would motivate 38% to make behavioral changes.

Your Children Can Easily Learn To Be Takers and Not Givers

So many people ask how to teach their kids about money, hoping they can get a 1-2-3 formula to use that will help their child become a wise caretaker of his/her money. Many parents ask this question because they are terrified that their children will turn out just like themselves when it comes to spending money. They hope that the “Do as I say, not as I do” method might actually work in this case. They almost always learn by example. They learn from your examples, dad and mom.

STEP 1 Put into practice the things that you want your children to learn. If you expect a 5, 6, or 7 year old to learn to handle money wisely, surely you as a grown adult will be capable of doing it too.

STEP 2 The second step in the formula is to teach children how to earn money before they learn how to handle it. This should seem logical and you may say, “Well of course everyone knows that!” But do they? The people we deal with on a daily basis don’t seem to know that. How many people do you know that spend money they haven’t even earned? How many dollars worth of credit card debt do you have? Isn’t that spending money you haven’t earned yet?

The best way to help children learn positive work ethics and give them a chance to earn money is through chores. There is nothing wrong with age appropriate chores and jobs. Chores help to teach children the weights and balances of earning and spending. If you earn $10, you can spend $10. A lot of parents live with the idea that one can spend $10 and then frantically try to work to get $10 to pay for it. Another alternative that seems to be gaining popularity is to mooch off of someone like their parents or to become indebted to a credit card company.

It’s no wonder children are getting confused.  It is because they are receiving mixed messages from dad and mom. This is why it is so important for parents to get their acts together first. Whatever you do, don’t give your children allowances when they haven’t earned them. You are doing your children a great injustice when you do this. They learn early on that they don’t have to do a thing because mom and dad will pay for it. Twenty years later, parents find themselves with a 28-year-old man sitting on their couch.

By giving kids money and “stuff” without having to earn it, they learn to be takers and not givers. Then we wonder why, as adults, they have the attitude that the world owes them something for nothing. They have learned that they have no reason to bother to lift a finger to contribute to society. If you’re “tight with money”, children have a very keen sense of justice. They usually know when mom and dad are not paying them because things are in “crisis” mode.

STEP 3 is to be sure and teach your child about savings. There is no better way for a child to learn to save than for that child to quickly spend all of his money at a bubble gum machine and on candy bars and then see a sibling, who has carefully saved, be able to buy a really cool toy the next time they go shopping. Another way for kids to learn about saving is, when they desire something very much, to have mom or dad tell them to save their money for it. You can’t break down and buy it for them because you will defeat the purpose. Just wait and after a while, you will come to realize how exciting it is for a child to save and save and then finally reach their goal’s end.

With more money comes more responsibility. Keep the amount of money you give your children in proportion to how responsible they are. This will help them to learn to use their money wisely rather than to waste it because they have more than they know what to do with. Teach your children to use a small part of their money to buy gifts and to give to others. Remember, the whole object is to learn to be wise stewards of their money and to be givers not takers.

Here are 10 possible reasons you aren’t a millionaire:  

Take a hard look at the list, and do some reflecting. If you want to be a millionaire, it’s well within your power, but you’ll have to face the issues that are currently keeping you from creating that wealth before you will have a chance to call yourself one.

1. You Care What Your Neighbors Think: If you’re competing against them and their material possessions, you’re wasting your hard-earned money on toys to impress them instead of building your wealth and self-esteem.

2. You Aren’t Patient: Until the era of credit cards, it was difficult to spend more than you had. That is not the case today. If you have credit card debt because you couldn’t wait until you had enough money to purchase something in cash, you are making others wealthy while keeping yourself in debt.

3. You Have Bad Habits: Whether it’s smoking, drinking, gambling or some other bad habit, the habit is using up a lot of money that could go toward building wealth. Most people don’t realize that the cost of their bad habits extends far beyond the immediate cost.

4. You Have No Goals: It’s difficult to build wealth if you haven’t taken the time to know what you want. If you haven’t set wealth goals, you aren’t likely to attain them. You need to do more than state, “I want to be a millionaire.” You need to take the time to set saving and investing goals on a yearly basis and come up with a plan for how to achieve those goals.

5. You Haven’t Prepared: Bad things happen to the best of people from time to time, and if you haven’t prepared for such a thing to happen to you through insurance, any wealth that you might have built can be gone in an instant.

6. You Try to Make a Quick Buck: For the vast majority of us, wealth doesn’t come instantly. You may believe that people winning the lottery are a dime a dozen, but the truth is you’re far more likely to get struck by lightning than win the lottery.

7. You Rely on Others to Take Care of Your Money: You believe that others have more knowledge about money matters, and you rely exclusively on their judgment when deciding where you should invest your money. Unfortunately, most people want to make money themselves, and this is their primary objective when they tell you how to invest your money.

8. You Invest in Things You Don’t Understand: Your hear that Bob has made a lot of money doing it, and you want to get in on the gravy train. If Bob really did make money, he did so because he understood how the investment worked. Throwing in your money because someone else has made money without fully understanding how the investment works will keep you from being wealthy.

9. You’re Financially Afraid: You are so scared of risk that you keep all your money in a savings account that is actually losing money when inflation is put into the equation, yet you refuse to move it to a place where higher rates of return are possible because you’re afraid that you will lose money.

10. You Ignore Your Finances: You take the attitude that if you make enough, the finances will take care of themselves. If you currently have debt, it will somehow resolve itself in the future. Unfortunately, it takes planning to become wealthy. It doesn’t magically happen to the vast majority of people.

Many parents say they will do anything for their children. But that doesn’t mean you have to go out on a financial precipice. Median Price Per Child: $338,000  

Children born in the U.S. today will cost their parents more than $338,000, on average, by the time they graduate from a public college. Send your precious offspring to a private university, and you can expect to shell out an additional $70,300 for tuition. Think education is your only big tab? Think again. Just keeping a roof over junior’s head will cost nearly $105,000 through age 18. Food will eat up $41,400, and health care will set you back $17,400 over 18 years.

Experts say the best way to plan for many of the biggest expenditures, be it college, vacations, child care, summer camp, or a Bar Mitzvah, is to set aside individual reserves of cash for each goal.  Most people don’t do that. Instead, they just throw it on a credit card and worry about it later. A good plan is an automatic investment program that transfers money out of your bank account on a recurring basis. Businessweek asked financial planners and advisers for additional strategies and tips on planning and saving for some of the biggest costs of child rearing.

College: Since this is your biggest potential expenditure, start saving as soon as possible, ideally within the first year of your child’s birth. Your best bet is probably a what’s known as a 529 college savings plan because the money accrues tax-deferred—and some states let you put away as much as $300,000. Here’s a good calculator to give you an idea why you should start saving now.

Housing: Aside from college, one of the biggest costs associated with raising children is providing shelter, which amounts to more than $100,000 per child over an 18-year span. The bulk of those costs go toward a mortgage, property taxes, maintenance, repairs, utilities, and furnishings. You can save money by handling some home maintenance yourself—but only tasks you’re capable of doing well.

Food: It certainly helps to shop in bulk at stores like Costco and Sam’s Club, but make sure you bring a list and stick to it. Another smart way to keep food costs in line is to learn to cook.

Activities: Extracurricular activities can get very expensive, with an average cost of $35,000 over an 18-year period. While your son or daughter might play ice hockey for just five months out of the year, your best bet is to set money aside year-round to finance things like the cost of team membership, additional ice time, travel, and equipment. Though parents may want to expose kids to many different experiences, one way to limit expenses is to focus your children on a few activities they are passionate about.

Child and Health Care: Costs for child care and health care are significant, though they vary wildly around the country. Find out whether your employer offers a child-care or health-care flexible spending account. If you are in the 28% federal tax bracket and live in a state with a 5% tax rate, a $5,000 annual contribution saves you $1,650 in taxes.

“Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don’t need.” ~From the movie Fight Club

Researchers have found that low self-esteem and materialism are not just a correlation, but also a causal relationship where low self esteem increases materialism, and materialism can also create low self-esteem. They also found that as self esteem increases, materialism decreases. The study primarily focused on how this relationship affects children and adolescents. Researchers found that even a simple gesture to raise self-esteem dramatically decreased materialism, which provides a way to cope with insecurity.  By the time children reach early adolescence, and experience a decline in self-esteem, the stage is set for the use of material possessions as a coping strategy for feelings of low self-worth.

Most of us want more income so we can consume more. Yet as societies become richer, they do not become happier. In fact, the First World has more depression, more alcoholism and more crime than fifty years ago. This paradox is true of Britain, the United States, continental Europe and Japan. Statistically people have more things than they did 50 years ago, but they are actually less happy in several key areas. There is also the considerable cost of what materialism does to the environment. We don’t yet know what final toll that could take in terms of quality of life and overall happiness. What many people don’t understand is that if we want to save the environment then at some level we have to buy and consume less.

The reason people want whatever is currently “hot” is because they believe it will contribute towards their satisfaction and happiness in life. The word “believe” is the key here. People believe that buying more and more things will make them happy, when in fact research has shown time and time again that this simply isn’t the case.

10 Nightmare Handshakes: Which One Are You?

Handshakes have been around since the birth of civilization. In fact, they were originally a way to prove you had no weapons in your hand when meeting someone new. Nowadays, we use handshakes in meetings, greetings, offering congratulations, closing a business deal or sometimes just to say, “How’s it goin’?” No matter the basis of your handshake, it should become part of your repertoire. Handshakes are a sign of trust and help build strong relationships. Prospective employers said they’re more likely to overlook visible body piercings and tattoos than an ineffective handshake, according to a 2001 survey of human resources professionals. Plus, when you shake hands with people upon meeting, they’re two times more likely to remember you than if you didn’t shake hands. The time has come to find out if your grip is powerful, pathetic or just plain bad.

To evade making a bad first impression, losing a business deal or simply embarrassing yourself, take heed of 10 terrible grips to avoid:

1. The “Macho Cowboy”… is the almost bone-crunching clasp many businessmen use to shake hands. What are they trying to prove, anyway? There’s no need to demonstrate your physical strength when shaking another person’s hand.

2. The Wimp… is usually delivered by men who are afraid to “hurt the little lady” when shaking women’s hands. Modern female professionals expect their male counterparts to convey the same respect they’d show their male colleagues.

3. The “Dead Fish”… conveys no power. While there’s no need to revert to the macho cowboy death grip, a firm clasp is more powerful than one that barely grabs the hand.

4. The “Four Finger”… is when the person’s hand never meets your palm, and instead clasps all four fingers, crushing them together.

5. The Cold and Clammy… feels like you’re shaking hands with a snake. Warm up your hand first before grabbing someone else’s.

6. The Sweaty Palm… is pretty self-explanatory, and pretty gross. Talcum powder to the rescue.

7. The “I’ve Got You Covered” Grip… happens when the other person covers your hand with his or her left hand as if your shake is secretive.

8. The “I Won’t Let Go”… seems to go on for eternity because the other person won’t drop his or her hand. After two or three pumps, it’s time to let go.

9. The “Southpaw”… happens when the person uses the left hand to shake because the right hand has food or a drink. Always carry your drink and plate with your left hand to keep your right one free for meet and greets.

10. The “Ringed Torture”… occurs when the person’s rings hurt your hand. Try to limit the number of rings you wear on the right hand to only one or two and be mindful of any that have large stones.

Six Steps To An Effective Greeting:
1. Stand up
2. Step or lean forward
3. Make eye contact
4. Have a pleasant or animated face
5. Shake hands
6. Greet the other person and repeat his or her name

Once I’ve read a book I keep it. It becomes a part of me.

Serious leaders who are serious readers build personal libraries dedicated to how to think, not how to compete. It is impossible to put together a serious library on almost any subject for less than several hundred thousand dollars. Perhaps that is why — more than their sex lives or bank accounts — chief executives keep their libraries private.

Few Nike colleagues, for example, ever saw the personal library of the founder, Phil Knight, a room behind his formal office. To enter, one had to remove one’s shoes and bow: the ceilings were low, the space intimate, the degree of reverence demanded for these volumes on Asian history, art and poetry greater than any the self-effacing Mr. Knight, who is no longer chief executive, demanded for himself. “I’m always learning.”

Forget finding the business best-seller list in these libraries. Students of power should take note that C.E.O.’s are starting to collect books on climate change and global warming, not Al Gore’s tomes but books from the 15th century about the weather, Egyptian droughts, even replicas of Sumerian tablets recording extraordinary changes in climate.

Personal libraries have always been a biopsy of power. The empire-loving Elizabeth I surrounded herself with the Roman historians, many of whom she translated, and kept one book under lock and key in her bedroom, in a French translation she alone of her court could read: Machiavelli’s treatise on how to overthrow republics, “The Prince.” Churchill retreated to his library to heal his wounds after being voted out of power in 1945 — and after reading for six years came back to power.

It took Dee Hock, father of the credit card and founder of Visa, a thousand books to find The One. Mr. Hock walked away from business life in 1984 and looked back only from his library’s walls. He built a dream 2,000-square-foot wing for his books in a pink stucco mansion atop a hill in Pescadero, Calif. In his library, Mr. Hock found the book that contained the thoughts of all of them. Visitors can see opened on his library table for daily consulting, Omar Khayyam’s “Rubáiyát,” the Persian poem that warns of the dangers of greatness and the instability of fortune.